To have a baby, or not to have a baby?
We had always planned to generally have two (maybe three) kids, and loved the idea of them being about two years apart. So after Owen turned one, we started discussing when we might want to try for number two. Cody was on board pretty quickly, but I surprised myself by not feeling ready. I had always wanted a two year gap but when that time came, I felt like I wasn't ready to be done with my special time with just Owen. So we waited closer until it really would be a two year gap and thought if it took longer to get pregnant than it would just be a little bigger of a gap. Well, similar to the first go round with Owen, we got pregnant pretty quickly. (If you remember with Owen, it was quite literally the very first try. *High five to each other. This time it took two tries, this time meaning two months, and then we got that pink line.)
The timing lines up almost exactly with Owen's pregnancy timeline. Seriously everything is just a few days apart. Owen's original due date was April 29, but we induced and had him May 2nd. This second one is due May 3rd, so they will definitely be right about two years apart - and Cody has already stated we will absolutely be doing joint birthday parties up until they are old enough to protest the idea.
I don't like to admit this, but honestly I had a lot of mixed feelings at the beginning of this pregnancy. I was definitely excited and we wanted and planned on this baby, but I also felt so, SO, sad to immediately know that my one-on-one time with Owen now had a definite end date. I know that this will be an amazing and wonderful change, and we are so excited for him to have a sibling and for us to have a second adorable baby to love and cuddle and raise, but it took me a lot longer than I thought to start feeling accepting of losing my time with just Owen. After all change can be scary, and the unknown can be scary, and I have SO loved this time being a stay at home mom with Owen each day. Once baby #2 is here there will never be the same undivided attention for either of them to receive, not like Owen has now. There won't be the ability to completely relish in just one child's everything in the same sole focus way. And I'm now starting to have questions of things logistically... like how do you physically manage wrangling two kids (as Owen is getting more and more difficult to manage at times)? And how will it go trying to nurse a newborn with a toddler running around still wanting and needing attention? I already feel like we take forever and it's a small ordeal to leave the house with just Owen... so I imagine it will then take twice as long and we will need to pack up twice as much... and we will likely be twice as late! Hopefully we will one day find a system to remedy the lateness. Sorry Loves, I seem to be ingrained with the tardy gene.
But on the opposite side of all those thoughts and questions, I know that we will have even more love and laughter and joy with this second baby. I am SO glad they will have each other to grow up with, and play with, and yes tease and annoy each other, but also to support and protect each other, and just experience life together. I am so excited to see Owen become a big brother! He has such a sweet wonderful nature that I'm sure he will take to being a big brother with ease (hopefully at least) and immediately love and cherish his little sister. I can't wait to see him kiss her and hold her and do things to help with the new baby. It will be a sweet new time for sure.
So now if you're interested in a little more specific info... hopefully I will find time to backtrack and share my experience so far this this pregnancy, but for now I'll just say that it has been difficult and very different than being pregnant with Owen. I have been way more sick (and I was pretty nauseous with Owen) and more exhausted and showing a lot earlier and already getting bigger!
We are currently 16 weeks along. We wanted to share our news sooner but were waiting on our test results to find out the gender (and oh my gosh that test was the biggest most ridiculous ordeal and hassle!), because we wanted to just do one big announcement all at once. So two weeks later than we expected, we finally got the results, and are so excited it's a GIRL!
Owen's going to have a little sister, and we are so thrilled to finally share our news!
Here's to wonderful changes ahead and a growing family : )
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